Hearthpwn

I was bored, so why not elect Miss Hearthstone 2016 ?

Here are all the carefully hand-picked contestants. I limited the cast to the 16 female characters I consider the most attractive while having a charm that makes each of them unique. You may disagree with me for a few cases but I bet your #1 choice is still in this list.

1 - Auchenai Soulpriest

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She looks so sweet and innocent with her white hair and the purple aura surrounding her body but don't be fooled, for this lady bears a terrible curse: her kisses and caresses would burn your skin! If she offers you a threesome with Mistress of Pain (or Wickerflame Burnbristle if you're into this), as exciting as it may sound, don't accept!

2 - Armorsmith

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Women doing manly jobs are often attractive. Armorsmith - or Diane Cannings of her real name - is no exception. The hot forge she works with makes her slender but hourglass-shaped body permanently covered in sweat. Her simple Girl Next Door charm earned her a place in this contest.

3 - Aviana(l)

Artwork(s):

You're into zoophilia but still want to look normal? Aviana is for you! She's hard to get though since she's a Wild God and despises mortals. Also she's quite a bitch like most of her daughters (as exemplified by this quote: "But I confess, part of me wants to fly up and simply watch this whole... world... burn.") but if you can get through that, she'll bring to the 7th Heaven. Literally.

4 - Confessor Paletress

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The least we can say is that her skimpy clothes are atypical for a clergywoman. However it has the upside of boosting church attendance amongst tournament participants who attend more for her body than her (arguably annoying) sermons. She's also an avid reader of the "Steamy Romance" novel series according to rogues. Do you think she wears any panties? She wouldn't mind if you just checked by yourself.

5 - Darkshire Librarian

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She's nerdy, she has glasses... and she has tentacles instead of legs. She is the dream girl of all weaboos and Japanese men! Be sure to check if she doesn't have a tentacle between her legs though, you can never know.

6 - Jaina Proudmoore

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Ah, the smart and beautiful Jaina Proudmoore, leader of the Kirin Tor! Many men fantasizes on her since her first appearance in Warcraft 3. What they don't know though is that she has frequent and severe mood swings, she can go from hot to cold and vice versa in a few seconds. Given what she's been through, we can't really blame her. She contributed to her father's killing by fellow heroes Thrall and Rexxar, not one but TWO of her ex-boyfriends turned out to be power-hungry psychopaths, and finally her city got bombed by Garrosh Hellscream. This almost excuses her for that Freeze Mage cancer. Almost.

7 - Master of Disguise

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WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE'S A MALE TAUREN????

8 - Nightbane Templar

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This beautiful blood elf has sworn to protect Arcanagos - now known as Nightbane - with her life. Why? Nobody knows, but Nightbane would probably be very happy to have such a gorgeous woman at her service if he wasn't an undead dragon who don't care about those things. What a waste!

9 - Secretkeeper

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You'll never tell? I bet you'll never tell what I'm going to do to your ass! You're the postergirl for all cancer decks but your big round butt compels me to forgive you. Those tits are quite alluring too by the way.

10 - Sludge Belcher

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Look at this gorgeous creature guys! Loot at those curves! She is the incarnation of beauty! In fact, she's so beautiful that I've decided to not include her in the poll in order to give other contestants a chance, as I know you would've all voted for her if I did.

11 - Spellbender

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Another blood elf from Genzoman? This guy knows how to draw elves. Spellbender has the special ability to redirect to her face anything you throw at anyone, be it Fireballs, Blessing of Kings... or something else.

12 - Succubus

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"Warlocks have it pretty good" indeed they do. They never play Succubus, but they sure like to play with her, no matter what injury they could receive from this demonic slut's whip or tail. They like it anyway.

13 - Sylvanas Windrunner

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Sylvanas has quite a lot of flesh on the bones for a corpse! The Ranger-general-of-Quel'Thalas-turned-Banshee-Queen-turned-Warchief-of-the-Horde does not look like your average undead girl: no apparent bones and no visible mark of decomposition. She was hot in life, she's hot in undeath. At least she can thank Arthas for that. Unfortunately, like other lore characters in this contest, she is a bitch. Also, I hope you don't like maggots.

14 - Tyrande Whisperwind

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If you can't stand Anduin's dumb face, then Tyrande's arrival in HS was providential. I know, she's already taken. But she isn't very faithful, as demonstrated in Warcraft 3 when she left Malfurion to free his brother Illidan Stormage - who's also in love with her - against her husband's wishes. Also Malfurion is asleep in the Emerald Dream banging Ysera in elven form during half of the year (and gets anal raped by pirate decks during the other half) so... we all have our chance!

15 - Valeera Sanguinar

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Valeera is not only gorgeous, she is also an extraordinary fighter. Unlike Jaina and Tyrande who cowardly stay in the rear to fight, Valeera doesn't hesitate to jump into the fray. As a combo class, she is also very smart. She learns very quickly and loves to use her opponent's tactics against them (a trait she shares with Tyrande). Rogues do it from behind... but do they like taking it from behind?

16 - Warsong Commander

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Her glory days are gone but she still holds a special place is Garrosh's heart. Beautiful and fierce, like orcish men love them. She has been nicknamed "Snow White" because she was often accompanied by seven dwarves. Rumors say she regularily has gangbangs with them during which they shout "Everyone, get in her!" but you know that's just rumors.

Quote from Azonem >>

Where is Aya Blackpaw? my vote is for her.

Quote from Boethion >>

You're missing quite a lot of waifus on that list. Elven Archer, Beckoner of Evil, Mistress of Pain, Pint-Sized Summoner, Kabal Courier, Grove Tender, Shadowcaster and Priestess of Elune all would like to have a word with you.

Let me see: 

Shadowcaster would probably be up there if you put her on the list. ;-;
Secretkeeper is preeetty good. So is Spellbender.
Sylvanas Windrunner is cool too.
Despite the fact that I'm pretty much a total weeb, I don't find Darkshire Librarian attractive at all. Stop making assumptions! Maybe it's the hairstyle, I just don't dig it. IDK.
What am I doing with my life.

By the way, I have no idea how long it took you to put this together, but that was some quality stuff to read through. Thanks for the laughs XD.