I am a Hearthstone 'whale'. I can use that word, because I am one. You can too if you are part of the pod, but you better not if you aren't, or we go all Orca. Don't mis-appropriate our culture, please, we are endangered, and when you make our environment so noisy, well, you can't understand how it feels to get beached out until you have been there, high and dry, baking on the ironically golden sand, as your rope runs out.
All (ok, some) kidding aside, I make a good living and don't mind financing Blizz and the game I like playing in a way that increases my personal aesthetic enjoyment. That might be a little more important given I am only a slightly better than average player, lol, so animated portraits do make me feel somehow like this is a little less a waste of my time. I cringe a little every time I buy one, having bought into that self-whale-hate a little. But when I get around to opening them, ahhhh, shiny, lol.
But I am not just spouting off to try and amuse you; I do want to share some info that helped me overcome bundle buying woes and maximize golden collection spread for other whales (and allies). After the rank 1 bundles appeared in my shop, I bought them and the rank 2 bundles did not appear right away. When they did the next day, I entered my card info and clicked, it said 'Sorry, you are not eligible for this purchase." and kicked me back to the shop, where the rank 2 bundles still sat, taunting me like a yacht club I am not allowed to dock at.
I figured, glitch. Has to be one, I just KNOW Blizzard wants my krill. They made the offer, there was literally no fine print regarding eligibility requirements, and under the United States Uniform Commercial Code, if an offer is made and acceptance follows, that's a contract... the seller must deliver the goods. Its federal law, Donnie Baker!
So I log out of the game and into my Blizz account to change cards, thinking maybe its the card I am using. Log back in, and the bundles are gone! Sigh. Refused service! I filed a service ticket, and was told some baloney... the guy was clearly making something up to get the ticket closed. Said my August purchase of the Golden Stormwind Bundle for $79.95 invalidated my eligibility for the rank 2 bundle.
I wrote back, arguing that is ridiculous, why would a purchase from a prior promotion invalidate a different bundle now, especially if it let me buy rank 1? I mentioned the complete lack of any fine print, how they made an offer and when I accepted, refused it, uinlawfully (I kept hearing comedian Donnie Baker's voice 'It's State Law!"). I reminded them that dangling golden cards in front of a whale and then refusing to sell them, well, that's just cruel. I mean, at least bait the hook.
I told them 'think about it, you really think your bosses want you to not find a way to take my krill? Maybe you better elevate this to someone who gets it enough to at least give me an explanation that makes sense. Got a second reply saying 'Really sorry, but as we have had no other complaints, we have no way to fix it. Suggest you go file a bug report, and maybe they can work it. "
Its not the first time I have gotten that rote response to a ticket...always amazes me that customer service wants us to do their jobs... is there some reason they can't go file that bug report and do their job, serving the customer, instead of trying to make us do it for them? We are not free labor for Blizz.
I give up. Just keep swimming, I tell myself in Dori's voice. Maybe I can quit. Yeah, that's what I'll do, right after I hit legend someday.
So I go back to playing, stuck at platinum near diamond late in the month as usual, but now, all I notice is the lifeless dullness of every fourth card that is still non-golden. In fairness, I have not dusted a gold card in my entire 7+ year play history, unless it was nerfed or I had more than the max playable (and have stopped doing that given there is no limit in Arena, my favorite format).
So yeah, between that and having bought every standard gold bundle they ever offered (and didn't renege on!) and having crafted many gold cards, I have like 70-80% of the gold standard cards). Still not enough to get a golden coin in Arena like Kripp though! Just knowing that bundle is out there and I cant get it or the mythical rank 3 bundle... I am just harpooned.
Then today, I logged in and noticed it was back! But crap, I was on my Europe account, the free to play one where I code-switch to pass for a non-whale. My blowhole spouted a raspberry. I only shovel krill for gold cards in the Americas! And I had just been there with no rank 2 bundle in sight from one horizon of the shop sea to another. But I have to know, and go back... and AHOY! There is rank 2 GOLD in that thar shop!
I click the purchase button and get a blanked out card wizard.... weird, it is usually prepopulated. I have to type my name, #s, everything in, which is hard with flippers that are so big and yards apart, but I manage, and click.... SUCCESS! Wait, Golden Magtheridon as my first bonus GL? Figures, lol,
So, just be aware, the gold bundle buying experience can be a little like bubble fishing in a harbor full of freighters at full speed, you gotta watch out for the propellers! But if you have trouble getting the bundle in your shop, just keep checking the shop. Logging out and back in (especially if you switch servers) seems to reset this bundle sometimes. It seems to come and go at random, kind of like plastic shopping bags and glitter in the path of my meals. If you're a whale, too, you get it.
Now, if I could just find that rank 3 bundle. When we spot it, let's hope Ahab isn't on board!
Anyway, everyone krill out, its just a game, and we whales do our best to keep the game free for the rest of you. Please, save the whales!
Update: Got the rank 3 bundle! 24 more Golden standard packs and 2 more Golden Standard Legendaries! Here is the best tip: Just keep those packs sealed in your mouth, like Jonah, if you already have a lot of golden standard commons, rares and epics. Don't open them until the next set is live. Because as Standard packs, they are basically like a pre-purchase of the next sets cards, at least partially, because if you don't open them till its live, the algorithm favors cards you have never opened!
If you do HODL them sealed, when you get your pre-purchase bundles (as we whales most always do), do NOT open any packs during a Tavern Brawl early opening session: Standard packs wont pick up new set cards before the set is live... keep waiting. Once the set is live, open the Golden Standard packs first, so that you preset your collection of the newest set with as many golden cards as possible before you open the regular pre-purchase packs!
Waiting, with the patience of a whale, this way, you will minimize the occurrence of golden cards you already have and reduce third goldens. Any golden Legendaries, epics or rares you get are more likely to be from the new set (if you already have a lot from earlier sets)., but even if not, they will fill gaps in the rest of your standard golden collection.
One other benefit of this is that it synergizes with older advice to craft whatever Golden Legendaries you want before opening pre-purchase packs, because if you open your golden standard packs first (even before crafting any individual golden legendary), then you may just get the golden legendary you wanted and not have to craft it. If you do not, then right after opening Golden Standard Packs, but before opening pre-purchase set packs, go ahead and craft those legendaries that you especially want golden. Then the last thing you do is open the pre-purchase cards.
I am happily sitting on 37 packs of (mostly) the next sets' golden cards and holding till day one the next set is live! If you live near the shore and hear happy whale-song, that may just be me! If any of the pod care to, sing along!