Hearthpwn

I have my final exam this week, i apologize i write so little. I don't really have the time to offer feedback this round.

For my class, i did a bit of a rework on some cards. I removed the "attack" package as it felt a bit out of place. I'm not giving up on the idea, i want to do it in the next round. Just for this half of the set i thought it'd be best if i only focused on a few themes and mechanics: dragons, Fresh Blood and hero powers. I changed some stuff around, like Vulcanus and Second Flame to be more useful.

My challenge card is Devoted Servant, who uses that Omega mechanic thing from Boomsday. Let me know what you think, feedback is appreciated.

 

Bloodburner Apprentice Set 1

 

 

 

Hey, finally got my first cards from what I'm gonna call the Adept set for the Narrator!

At first I was not sure whether to make  keyword or not, tell me what fo you think of this:

Also here's the upgraded Hero Power.

The idea is, Narrator has certain cards that build up if she sets the momentum of her storytelling by manipulating the cost of the cards to go faster... or slower, something I can work with in Saviors of Uldum. Not only hand manipulation, but also board interactions, potential combos and secrets are some of the flavor I wanted to keep/add in this set. Hope you like it:

Manuscript of Shifting Words is a reference to good old cards like Shifter Zerus or Shifting Scroll, and opens the way to interesting synergies, keeping in mind the secrets are from all classes.

The Journey Begins is an intention to showcase a variety of scenarios for Narrative to shine. In this one, a cicle card turns into a telegraphed draw, very useful for many different decks. Research is there to grant support, and so is Tragic Fall, altho that one can be used kind of better for ramping cards, lke The Nemesis, wich I wanted to be a powerhouse of a deck that could reliably target it.

I wanted to give more creatvity to Narrator Secrets, thus their effects so far are potentially stronger but need better build up. Librari-bot is there to help keeping the opponent confused, as well as being fairly good on its own.

Arcane Aeda is intended to be a nice card both for aggressive deck that will thank the buff, and slower ones, who can stack Book Keepers to use them as a rush AoE later.

 

Thanks in avance for the feedback!

EDIT: everything is fixed.

Quote from SoupCake >>

Greetings. I will be presenting you with the Apprentice set for the Witch class.

 

 

The Witch class will be using the Saviors of Uldum expansion. The first 10 cards of the Apprentice set I will be revealing today focus on more familiar synergy with some more control cards. The deck variants I am looking to push forward at the end of the 20 Apprentice cards is a Deathrattle/Familiar and Control Witch.

 

Keyword

This keyword can make for some interesting plays and synergies with certain cards.

 

Cards

 Challenge Card

 Tokens

 Hoping for some feedback! Thanks.

 Love the concept.  Add more familiars!  A 3/3 wolf, a 7/7 bear, etc.

The merchant: Freshman set part 1

"Oh, hello what brings you to my office? What? Not happy with the work conditions? What are you saying about I promised to teach you money's most intricate secrets? Today's teachings: Never trust a goblin's words! See? Each day you learn something new. Yesterday you learnt about moving not suspicious boxes from one place to another, and the day before that to get punched by a very angry ogre collector. All these lessons are important, you know? Oh well, I guess some people can't be happy. I, Trade Prince Gallywix, have been putting all my well-spent years in the best goblin finance academy (I assure you that it completely exists!) to create the best cards to illustrate my fantastic keyword: Profit! Most short-sighted people can only see the sort-term value. They drool playing their stupid rogue Combo cards and whatever fancy things other classes offer. But... what if I discovered a way to play not-so-fancy cards that give you resources to play more-than-your-average fancy cards next turn? And with that, my brilliant idea, Profit, came to light!"

"Isn't it cool? Now you can play big things before anyone else! The following cards may not be the best if we talk about fast impact, but you'll get the last laught the following turn!"

"You might ask, what if we arrive at maximum Mana Crystals? Can we have more with profit? Sadly, the answer is no, the hearthstone's laws forfeit it. Joking, of course we can always cheat! In goblin's language that's called 'fair game'!"

Heck, most of the time you won't even need to cheat! Remember that money fluctuates more than any form of magic, you may prefer to break your mana than just use it, so don't expect to always have 10 mana crystals on turn 10!"

"As always, expect big guys comin' with us. They always follow the wealthy, that's why wealth is the same as power!"

"Oh, and last but not least we've got a new big member in our company! This little robot has been working his whole lifeto get a name in the economics industry. With enough investment, you'll get huge value out of him!"

"Before I forget, here's Project Planification's token, Long-Term project! Got that 'Cats when drawn' idea from where I started in Hearthstone, the great Goblins vs Gnomes *sigh* I still get nostalgic of those times! An old colleague that also started there made a huge BOOM in the Netherstorm, maybe I'll visit him one of these days!"

Feedback:

@Noah_McGrath

 @MvonTzeskagrad

 

Quote from SoupCake >>

@SideItem

Thanks for your suggestions. Just to clarify, Blood Pact can trigger more than once. I should have made that clear. I'll have Blood Pact on minions in the next 10, I wanted to do it on spells for now. 

Changes:

  

I'd like to hear feedback about this change. I realize now that the wording is a bit hard to read on the first card so I changed up the design to make it trigger Blood Pact for some more combos.

No idea what I was thinking when making it deal 8 damage. I tuned down the power a bit to make it less powerful.

 Ah I think I understand.  If Blood Pact is a minion keyword then the spells should probably be worded that they are giving the minion additional card text, ala Ancestral Spirit. So Evil Lair would be: Give a minion "Blood Pact: Add a random Witch spell to your hand."

The reworked Witchslayer looks much better.  Bleed might be a bit too strong still at 5 damage, but at 4 it would be fine.  I like the Blood Pact synergy.

Quote from MvonTzeskagrad >>

snip

 I like the Narrative keyword, although I think the tooltip wording might need some clarification. Something like "A bonus if this card's Cost has been changed," would make it sync up with stuff like Combo.

The two examples of Cost-reducing you've shown so far are good, I look forward to seeing the other enablers in the rest of the set.  For Manuscript of Shifting Words you might want to add "(from any class)" to make that aspect of the randomness clearer, I think for spell generating effects it's usually specified whether the spell is from a particular class or any class.  The Journey Begins Narrative effect could probably be "Discover a copy of a minion in your deck", which would put it in line with stuff like Stitched Tracker and Shadow Visions.

Copy editing wise, there's some uncapitalized keywords you'll want to watch out for.  Specifically, "Battlecry" and "Secret" should be capitalized and bolded when they're referenced in a card text.  Overall really good work!

Quote from Klipce >>

Thank you @MvonTzeskagrad and @Anatomy_of_Time for your kind words and feedback. I feel like Channel is mostly well urdestood now but I think a few things need to be pointed out. Some cards with Channel can indead target an enemy as the primary target but the keyword will only add friendly characters to the spell's targets. So Savage Lightning, for instance, can be used to turn an enemy minion into 3/2 Raptor. If that first target has a tribe and this tribe is shared by friendly minion, those minions will be transformed as well. The keyword as a whole, yes, encourages single-tribe decks but the Primalist will also recieve incentives to play several tribes in the same deck or not particularly care about tribal synergies and focus on playing the best minions form the class.

With that, here's how the first part of the of the Pioneer Set is turning out :

Showcase :

Challenge cards :

Don Han'Cho and the handbuff from MSoG inspired Passionnate Saurok.

Menagerie Magician and the menagerie from ONiK inspired Primal Scalepriest.

 Rest of the set :

I'm very happy with it and will post it (with proper explanations and flavor) tomorrow or the day after. Is everything okay ? Do you see jarring problem that I missed ?

 

Reviews :

@Anatomy_of_Time

Your et looks great ! Eliana seems fine at Spell Damage +2 (strong but not busted) since it costs quite a lot. 16 damage from hand on turn 10 is powerful but it does take 4 turns of setup. My main concern is it's combination with the new River's Favor which could make it very hard to remove. If she sticks, Eliana really becomes a huge problem and can hand the game. I don't know if it's so bad but it's obviously quite strong.

I really like your aggressive empty-hand archetype, it's an interesting spin on your class' card-hoarding nature.

 @Noah_McGrath

I like your new Flame Sweep and Volcanus (why did the name hange anyways ?) and your new cards are cool. The control nature of the class make the Omega mechanic very fitting. I'm still uncofortable with your miw of Armor and Healing still. Idk, it seems confusing that the two are mixed in a class. They are basically interchangeable, except for the synergies that come with them, which means that if you have both you will have a hard time making synergy cards that work across the whole class.

 @MvonTzeskagrad

Narrative is an interesting keyword but since cost reduction is already a possitive effect, adding yet another bonus on top might throw balance out the window. I also don't love cost manipulation mechanics in general because they often lead to overpowered combos.

I like your Secrets, espacially with Manuscript of Shifting Words, tho Astral Compendium is very similar to Netherwind Portal.

 I didn't get a change to give feedback to @SoupCake and @whatTheHeck before they posted but just ask and I'll give you my thoughts.

 So far everything seems ok. Volcanus changed because i made a typo and was lazy to remake the card xD. As for armor and heals, there is only 1 card that gives armor which is Flame Barrier. It hives armor because of a few reasons. Flavor wise, a barrier would make sense to be represented by armoe in game. Mechanic wise, it can be used at full health and it makes the other healing cards better, as you have missing health to heal now. Originally it was just the effect of Crystalizer in spell form but i decided to have it actually gain you 3 hp overall so it's not only used to activate Fresh Blood (though that is mainly why it exists).

@Anatomy_of_Time

Thanks for letting me know about the upgraded Hero Power. I would have totally forgotten.

 

Ok so, attempt at final formatting. If i miss anything please let me know.

Bloodburner Apprentice Set 1

Bloodburner is a risky control class that has high power but high cost cards and effects. the hero power is the class' most valuable asset, keeping aggressive players at bay in the early game and triggering the new keyword Fresh Blood late game. The class is grindy control oriented, with many value spells and cards ensuring you never run out of steam. Dragons are a core aspect of a class as well, being one of the strongest tribes as the game goes on. This class is introduced during Rastakhan's Rumble, as a surprise 10th competitor in the arena. Serving the blood god G'Huun, and with the might of fire, blood and dragons, bloodburners will surely take the throne!

Showcase Cards: 

 

Rest of the cards:

 

 

 

I finally finished my "Initiate set", which I decided to call an "Apprentice Set". I used a watermark of the DH's set, because I wanted to follow the idea Blizzard created and didn't want to use Classic watermark. I would love to hear your opinion and some feedback, before I post my finall work in the submission thread.

                   

Here's my Basic set from last week

 

And here's this week's Apprentice set (the whole, I will yet think how to halve it)

Last but not least - the tokens

 

So that's it, I would be really glad to hear some feedback and advice about my cards. I really wanted to emphasize Blood Mage's class identity, which is like a mix of Warlock and Mage, but also with a lot of lifesteal and dangerous plays. BM's flaw should be a lack of taunt minions and general vulnerability.

PS. There are 2 challenge cards (I've decided to use Rise of Shadows):
1. Hakkar is meant to have the "Singleton" rule (remember that Saviors of Uldum would be released in about half a year), which we've last seen in Mean Streets of Gadgetzan (which is wild already).
2. Blood Bolt has the effect of Arcane Blast, a TgT card.

 

Quote from Anatomy_of_Time >>

Imprtant for people who've already submitted or are about to submit!

This was recently added to the rules:

Upgraded Hero Powers have also come to my attention. I agree with the reasoning I have seen.

Your Submission must now include an upgraded Hero Power.

As of right now, @whatTheHeck and @SoupCake have submitted a class that doesn't have an upgraded Hero Power. Please make one and add it to the submission thread! It would be super lame if you were to be disqualified for not noticing.

And if you haven't submitted yet, please read carefully the rules and FAQ of the submission thread!

That's all. Have a good day!

 Woah, thanks for the reminder seriously I've would been disqualified if you didn't say that! :)

Quote from MrBurger >>

@whatTheHeck you should change wording in Meteoric Fortune to : "and those moany of your Mana crystals", because now it looks like your destroying enem ones

 I based the card on the gadgetzan's potion that destroys a minion and a mana crystal, completely forgot that it added the "your" part in the text. Thanks for the reminder, I will try to change it later!

@Artimex723

Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't twisting nether do the exact same thing that your card does for one less mana? The rest of the set is cool.

Quote from whatTheHeck >>

@Artimex723

Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't twisting nether do the exact same thing that your card does for one less mana? The rest of the set is cool.

 Oh, yeah thanks, I forgot about Twisting Nether. I changed the card to be like this.

Quote from Artimex723 >>

I finally finished my "Initiate set", which I decided to call an "Apprentice Set". I used a watermark of the DH's set, because I wanted to follow the idea Blizzard created and didn't want to use Classic watermark. I would love to hear your opinion and some feedback, before I post my finall work in the submission thread.

                   

Here's my Basic set from last week

 

And here's this week's Apprentice set (the whole, I will yet think how to halve it)

Last but not least - the tokens

 

So that's it, I would be really glad to hear some feedback and advice about my cards. I really wanted to emphasize Blood Mage's class identity, which is like a mix of Warlock and Mage, but also with a lot of lifesteal and dangerous plays. BM's flaw should be a lack of taunt minions and general vulnerability.

PS. There are 2 challenge cards (I've decided to use Rise of Shadows):
1. Hakkar is meant to have the "Singleton" rule (remember that Saviors of Uldum would be released in about half a year), which we've last seen in Mean Streets of Gadgetzan (which is wild already).
2. Blood Bolt has the effect of Arcane Blast, a TgT card.

 

 Ok, don't take this the wrong way but in my opinion you have a lot of problems with your class. 

First of all, waaaaaay too much sustain. Almost half the cards have lifesteal, how are you supposed to play against this stuff? You have... 8 healing cards in the apprentice set alone, from 20 cards total. Most are minions with lifesteal who can heal twice or more if the opponent will trade into it. The hero power has lifesteal, you have 3 other heals in the basic set, it's too much in my opinion. I know it's a vampire class but still, this thing won't die to anything but heavy control.

Then you have a ton of cards that are just straight up powercreep:

• The upgraded hero power is busted. All upgraded hero powers usually double the effect. Fireblast deals 2 damage, Shapeshift gives 2 attack and 2 Health, Silver Hand summons two 1/1s etc. Particular hero powers only get inscreased by 1 (hunter) or have the downside reduced (warlock). Yours gets trippled.
• Lurking Banshee is a better Faerie Dragon.
• Vampiric Knight is a better Bloodworm.
• Moonlight Banshee is a better Novice Engineer.
• Graveyard Witch is a better Soot Spewer/Dalaran Mage.
• Raising the Dead is a better Eternal Servitude.

Blood Surge is a worse Twisting Nether but that's it, the only "weakness". I don't want to sound mean but i think you should tone down some stuff.

Edit: With the new Blood surge you got 2 self damage cards which i suppose helps with my main complaint, but it's still very little overall.

Quote from Noah_McGrath >>

Quote from Artimex723 >>

I finally finished my "Initiate set", which I decided to call an "Apprentice Set". I used a watermark of the DH's set, because I wanted to follow the idea Blizzard created and didn't want to use Classic watermark. I would love to hear your opinion and some feedback, before I post my finall work in the submission thread.

                   

Here's my Basic set from last week

 

And here's this week's Apprentice set (the whole, I will yet think how to halve it)

Last but not least - the tokens

 

So that's it, I would be really glad to hear some feedback and advice about my cards. I really wanted to emphasize Blood Mage's class identity, which is like a mix of Warlock and Mage, but also with a lot of lifesteal and dangerous plays. BM's flaw should be a lack of taunt minions and general vulnerability.

PS. There are 2 challenge cards (I've decided to use Rise of Shadows):
1. Hakkar is meant to have the "Singleton" rule (remember that Saviors of Uldum would be released in about half a year), which we've last seen in Mean Streets of Gadgetzan (which is wild already).
2. Blood Bolt has the effect of Arcane Blast, a TgT card.

 

 Ok, don't take this the wrong way but in my opinion you have a lot of problems with your class. 

First of all, waaaaaay too much sustain. Almost half the cards have lifesteal, how are you supposed to play against this stuff? You have... 8 healing cards in the apprentice set alone, from 20 cards total. Most are minions with lifesteal who can heal twice or more if the opponent will trade into it. The hero power has lifesteal, you have 3 other heals in the basic set, it's too much in my opinion. I know it's a vampire class but still, this thing won't die to anything but heavy control.

Then you have a ton of cards that are just straight up powercreep:

• The upgraded hero power is busted. All upgraded hero powers usually double the effect. Fireblast deals 2 damage, Shapeshift gives 2 attack and 2 Health, Silver Hand summons two 1/1s etc. Particular hero powers only get inscreased by 1 (hunter) or have the downside reduced (warlock). Yours gets trippled.
• Lurking Banshee is a better Faerie Dragon.
• Vampiric Knight is a better Bloodworm.
• Moonlight Banshee is a better Novice Engineer.
• Graveyard Witch is a better Soot Spewer/Dalaran Mage.
• Raising the Dead is a better Eternal Servitude.

Blood Surge is a worse Twisting Nether but that's it, the only "weakness". I don't want to sound mean but i think you should tone down some stuff.

Edit: With the new Blood surge you got 2 self damage cards which i suppose helps with my main complaint, but it's still very little overall.

 Yeah, that's exactly what I wanted to hear. Thanks, I will balance the cards you mentioned. It's still just my first time taking part in a competition like this, so I really appreciate such feedback.

It's a really good effort and you cards are beautiful.  I agree with the feedback that the above responder gave as as far as mechanics.  Also...the overall fear factor of the pictures may be too much.  You know Blizzard is on the fun cartoon side rather than the horror. 

@Artimex723

Btw, you should consider working more on Blood Surge, since it is a 5 mana Felfire Potion. Sacrifice Ritual seems like Vaporize powercreep to me, while Voodoo Trick might be far worse -imagine minions with divine shield attacking-.

I kinda have an awkward feeling about this class... I feel it's like playing big priest with secrets. Its biggest synergy with the class tribe is one consisting on rez, wich kind of goes against the other synergy cards, those reward play small Vampires, of wich you dont have many. I'd suggest working on more small minions in the future. This class seems to rely too much on attrition and possibly looping value of stuff -example, banshees-

 

Quote from MvonTzeskagrad >>

@Artimex723

Btw, you should consider working more on Blood Surge, since it is a 5 mana Felfire Potion. Sacrifice Ritual seems like Vaporize powercreep to me, while Voodoo Trick might be far worse -imagine minions with divine shield attacking-.

I kinda have an awkward feeling about this class... I feel it's like playing big priest with secrets. Its biggest synergy with the class tribe is one consisting on rez, wich kind of goes against the other synergy cards, those reward play small Vampires, of wich you dont have many. I'd suggest working on more small minions in the future. This class seems to rely too much on attrition and possibly looping value of stuff -example, banshees-

 

 Yep, I just wanted to give it a lot of directions it could take, like Warlock's classic set. Obviously some would be worse and some would be better, but in the end I wanted to shape it all together with my Expansion set. I agree with your points tho and I'm already working on the cards. Tomorrow I will share my changed cards. 

Also I wanted to mention, that while the class is meant to be a bit of a mix of Mage and Warlock, I wanted to make it a control class, with some board control, but also with Zoo options. I have also realized just now that indeed I didn't put that many cheap Vampires, so the midrange stuff makes no sense at all. I think that I will just cut some cards and add new ones.

Thanks for your feedback :D

Taking your comments into consideration... how about these for the Adept set?