Hearthpwn

I really hate  this game at times...

Playing Patches, didn't get my 1st Pirate until turn 8... It might be a bug. I don't think it's possible to have that much bad luck

In russian we say: "There's no pockets in coffin" haha

[gets offered only dumpster tier heroes]

"That's OK; maybe I'll get lucky at the tavern."

[gets garbage tavern offerings]

"No worries, maybe I'll have some easy matchups"

[faces every hero on their power spike turn]

"Well maybe we'll get some good in-battle RNG"

[every attack goes to the worst possible target]

fffffffffffffffffffffff-

I swear this mode just compounds your bad luck when you get a lousy hero.

hey you know what would be epic

if any of my minions AT ALL attacked the F-ing HYENA out of the 5 mouthbreathers going early cheese deathrattle beasts

No taunts by the way, this was au natural baby, haha, nothing but crap-tier luck, 5 rounds in a row. Didn't make a single misplay that game but, oopsie poopsie, my minions made a fuckywucky so now I LOSE.

Just got into a match and ALL BUT 1 other player is AFK. Are people doing quests that have them complete battlegrounds matches with any placement? what's going on?

Played as Patches. Bob didn't give me a single pirate until my 2nd refresh on turn 6.

Honestly the thing that bugs me the most in this game is that I’ll purposely play what ever isn’t being played by the other people and never find any power units. 

my last game,

4 people going elementals, 1 demons, 1 mech, so I decide to go beasts (as greybough) . I triple scavenger and pack leader  by turn 7 (feeling lucky). Don’t see a beast besides 2  stupid cats for 20 rerolls over 3 turns on tavern 3. But 3/4 of the elemental players have no trouble tripling up and filling the board. 

Wow, I think I was one of the elemental opponents in your game.  I don't pay for the extra hero choices, so I went with Rakanishu to buff a Molten Rock.  Imagine my surprise when I fought the other two players that had the same cards.  I tried to upgrade the tavern early to get the rest of the elementals early, but to your point EVERYONE managed to gold their boards. I've had the same experience when I was the only mech player in the game and playing into round 14 and upgrade to tier 5 still had not seen Mechano-egg, Replicating Menace, or Annoy-o-module.

Nothing like three people quitting on turn 1 when you are the cat. I somehow ended up finishing 2nd while getting pretty mediocre cards from my opponents.

Great aka-whatsit hero. Use HP every turn after the first. it's turn 10 before I get a single ice block or competitive spirit. After a patches run with practically no pirates, and certainly no good ones. Sure, I'll take a Strongarm on a turn when I have bought zero pirates. Multiple times (having many refreshes without pirates, still 3 mana HP when I tier up due to barely any pirates etc.). May as well not even bother playing with such bad offerings.

FUCK DRAGONS UP THEIR STUPID FUCKING ASSES

WHELP SMUGGLER NEEDS TO DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH 

NEW PATCH RUINED IN LESS THAN 2 DAYS. FUCK FUCK FUCK

Apparently they play tested the new patch loads. Ya, could have fooled me. How the fuck they didn't pick this up in testing is beyond me. This stupid crap is just so unfun to play against. If dragons are in a lobby then 90% of the time the winner is a dragon build smashing everyone for 25 damage a turn. 

Longing for the days of poisonous, divine shield murlocs already. Fuck me but what a fucking train wreck, even with the hotfix. 

Well, they finally fixed dragons, yay! But then they also fixed this little Frog fucker which had been disabled as soon as the patch went live. I thought he looked pretty cool at first and I loved the guy the first time I played him. Some crazy shit. No more than 6 hours later BG's descended into a game of whoever forces Frogs wins. I've had several games where 6 people in a lobby are all trying to force beasts. The other 2 players probably don't know how broken he is yet and are trying to go dragons. The winner is usually the first guy to get frog + Barron - that person is usually the most skilled in the lobby, obviously. 

So again, FUCK! Why?? Why is a 2 drop better than a 6 drop wolf for end game comp beasts? It makes no fucking sense at all. Right now Froggy, Rat, Bird, Barron and friends seem unbeatable. There's just nothing you can do. Yes, you can tech Zap but still - it shouldn't be this way.  And Frog builds can build around Zap by buffing Barron so there is literally fuck all you can do in some games. 

On a side note, it would have been nice for Blizzard to let players know which minions were disabled while they were fixing the bugs. I donkey rolled my way to 7th more than once looking for the Frog when he wasn't even in the game! I got 7th only because someone else dc'd or rage quit before I died. 

Right now we're back to where we were 5 days ago w dragons. If beasts are in the lobby it's pretty much guaranteed to be unfun. Unless you're the guy who gets the frog and barron first. 

I have faith in the patch though. I think it's good but they need to do something about the Frog. The demon doomsayer is also an issue but it pales in comparison to the frog.

Hearthstone seems so boring for me lately. I don't know how to find my joy anymore. Can't enjoy Ranked because I don't want to just play two of the same winning decks and I don't want to fight for all the Beasts in Battlegrounds. Probably need a break. Any other games doing well out there? I dabbled in Elder Scrolls a few ago. Maybe I'll go there as a breather. 

they need to lower the buff to +1/1 or remove the part that says give another beast this deathrattle because the game has decended into beasts and if one player is Tess they win. Now when I see Tess in the game I just go for any other build and hope to get 2nd or 3rd. 

While I am doing very well this meta, I don't think they took into account the time everything takes to animate.   I find I am running out of time way too much, where my only chance to be competitive is to constantly reset my phone.   Not sure why they don't speed the animations up, like they do when there's lag, when the match will take an ungodly amount of time.   Though part of the problem is how many lines involve you buying and selling a ton of cards, 'fun' to be a phone user now.  The anti-phone meta is here.

Trying to scam a golden Barron with Tony Two Tusk TWO games in a row only to realise he only works with Pirates. FML. 

Nothing like putting your feet up after a long day and playing some BG's... and coming 8th THREE FUCKING GAMES IN A ROW!! FML. Also on the biggest losing streak ever. Haven't placed higher than 5th in a week. Maybe it's time to find another hobby!